Love at first sight, isn't that the most superficial thing you have ever heard? For the majority of my life (About age 1-19) I considered myself Asexual, not that sex totally didn't interest me or the pursuit of love, but I was a teenager. What did I know about anything, especially anything relationship related? (Maybe I should ask Justin Bieber, he seems like he knows his stuff.) A few days ago I was asked if I would ever get married, and the answer is simply I don't know.
First off, I see marriage as a failed institution, especially in a western society such as America. We live in a country where women have more individualism and have the ability to voice their distress, unhappiness, and abuse of a marriage; thus, the spike in divorce rate over the past couple decades. Compared to a woman in a eastern society; a majority of the time who do not have the ability to speak or act out against their spouse without severe reprimand or fear of being ostracized from their community, so what are they? A complementary vice of their spouse? Where is the happiness in that? We live in a country where fidelity and faithfulness is practiced less then that instrument you decided to play in high school, and where kids are having kids. Where are the qualifications to becoming a parent, it's not like having a pet guinea pig. I'm not saying we don't have the right to procreate, because we definitely do; but every day I see in the news about increased rate in teen pregnancies, or see old friends already pregnant, and it kills me every time. How is a person going to raise another being, when that person cannot even take care of themselves. Maybe there needs to be some sort of test or certification in order to be qualified to become a parent. There is a ruthless cycle that has appeared causing severe psychological and emotional effects that last a life time (Hence our nation's recent outburst of anti-depressants;) a majority of parents are either not financially stable enough or simply do not care about how their child is nurtured whether its lack of nutrition, affection, attention, whatever it may be.
Justin Bieber
So why get married? For the financial benefits? Does money make you happy? For me at least, if I got married for the financial benefits it would make me a complete hypocrite. I have a strong belief in anti-capitalism, becoming a minimalist, and having a strong tie to nature. As a species, we are evolving and progressing way to fast, just look at the last forty to fifty years in comparison to history of mankind. It's hard to say to step back from the monster we have created because technology is to accustomed to everyday life now, but we are going to have to deal with the major issues we have created in the very near future. (Overpopulation, lack of resources, global warming)
Second, the issue of finding your "soul mate" and true love. This blog isn't a total bashing about how marriage fails and how true love doesn't exist, because it definitely does, but those who have found it are truly in the minority. I would have define true love as waking up every morning and finding beauty in your wife or life partner, or the ability to wake up every morning and be happy and excited to spend another day. With that definition, I find it totally absurd to wake up every morning for the next forty to fifty years seeing the same face no matter how strong the feelings I have for you, I will just lose interest or become bored. Maybe when I die alone I will regret this thought process but for now it seems like a reasonable assessment.
An Introvert's Perspective on Marriage and Love
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